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Jonghyun The Composer

18 December 2017. Kim Jonghyun has left all of us to the better place. At first, I was like “What kind of fuckery it is?” Am not a shawol, but Jonghyun is the composer that I respect a lot. When the news had been confirmed by SM Entertainment, I can’t help myself but crying a river. I have this dream to become a great composer, and one day I will met him then makes song together. Turn out God loves him more than I do. You had done a great job, Jonghyun. Thank you for everything. Thank you for not giving up your dream to being an idol. Thank you for all of beautiful song you had created for the rest of your life. Thank you for enduring your pain and being though for us. I am sorry, I can’t realize your pain. I am sorry, I can’t help you overcoming your depression. You will always be remembered by “Jonghyun The Composer” in my heart. I’ll pray for you, every single day.

Broken Home

It's been a long time since my last post. And I hope u will not be bored with this kind of post. Hell yes, I will blabbering about my problem again. Sorry, I just can't find another way to talk about it. Yesterday, my mom asking me to drove her to my grandma's house. In the middle of the way, unfortunately our motorcycle step into a hole (sorry for my bad English, I hope u will understand). So, I bring it to the service place. While waiting our motorcycle to ready to repair. My mom post unnecessary thing in my big-family group whats app. Although I know that this is my fault cause I lack of concentration while ride it, but I think she doesn't need to make this thing as the biggest mistake that my whole biggest family need to know. U know what she post? She said that "I am so unlucky, in the middle of the way to grandma's house my daughter makes false. She ride pass a hole, that makes us had to stop to repair the tire" I kind of mad at that, because right...

words or quotes?

I always act like I'm fine and everyone thinks I'm okay, but when the lights are off and I'm all alone. that's when my tears start to fall. Best thing 2016 has taught me so far is don't force relationships with anybody, if they wanna fwu they gone act like it, words mean nothing I want a hug. Not just a normal hug, one of those tight hugs that take my breath away, give me butterflies, and make me smile like crazy. Being in a relationship is not about kissing, dates, taking pictures or showing off. It's about being with the person who makes you happy. You can’t change how people feel about you, so don’t try. Just live your life and be happy. I want a relationship where everyone is like "damn, they're still together?" Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. The first person you think of in th...

The day

Today is the day when I finally deciding my own path of life. I know my mom wouldn't approve it immediately. But, soon as I am making any progress she will. It's so hurting when ur own mom are always disagree with anything u wanna do in your life. I know for damn sure that parents always hoping their best for their child. Meanwhile I had another dream that is so different path with my mom has been asking me to be lately. I realize something that nowadays I am becoming the bad ass children. I yell and raising my voice to my parents which makes my parents heartache. I promise to my self, I won't do it again. Because I wanna achieving my own goal. Right now, I am following my parents dream to graduating my collage and Am doing my thesis right now. I am doing my best so I can graduate on time. After graduating I will work harder so I can catch my own dream and make my parents proud of me.

Another Random

Last noon, my friends and I go to a place near my college. We are trying to do our task. Instead of doing our task, we ended up browsing about dance practice and video calling with an Arabic people from one of my friend face book. I also looking for some job that I can take during my time after classes. Cause I want work to helping my mom or at least I can spend my money on dancing class and acting class. Y’all now right, what is my damn goal?. As I said, I really want be an artist or actress. I love acting and dancing, although I like dancing more. This will be the year when I starting to reach my own goal and focusing in finishing my study. No more years, this will be the last year I am in this university, I promise. I don’t want delay it anymore. I am old enough for being a girl in a girl group right? So, I guess I’ll take my dream as an actress that loves to dancing and singing. I don’t know what fortune will say about my future. But I think it’s worth to try. When I brave enough...

There Goes My Baby Pt.1

Gambar
My ambition being an artist in Seoul is getting bigger. Not to mention, Bangtan is the most important reason why I am so eager to be an artist over there. If I can’t be with one of them, at least I can meet them or being participate in one of their music video, right?. I will work my asses to get myself over there and get a chance to meet them. Well, it won’t be my ambition if only I don’t know about Kpop. Blame my friend for welcoming me to Kpop, but am also thankful to her. If it’s not because of her, I won’t be able to know Bangtan and Bigbang. I won’t even know how awful and fun is trying the Kpop dance practice. I love to dance, but dancing Kpop song is different thing. Somehow the choreography is too complicated. Instead of dancing like the original choreography, I usually create new choreography. I guess it just because I love dance so much. Every time I listen to music, my body will move immediately. Although I also like to sing but I am way more confident in dancing tha...

Blaming God

Gambar
I am an 22 y.o girl, not too tall but not too short either. Am the tallest girl in my class to be honest. Shoulder length hair, tan skin, flat nose, have a dimple in my right cheek, i don't have bridge tooth, i have some pimples on my face, and good body shape (this is not me saying, but some of the boys in my college). I can be too girly or too boyish, it depends on my mood by the way. Just because of my feature some people even my lectures are bullying me. They often said like I am too handsome for being a girl and why am I too far away different with my young sister? Let me tell you about her. She is taller than me, she has bridge tooth, sharp nose, white skin, her face skin is too clear, and she is thin (Am saying this basic on the reality), well she is girly or I can say she is feminine.  the one in black veil is my young sister I just don't get it why Y'all comparing me to her? I am who I am, I love my self tho. Don't blame me because of my feature. God ...