Another Random

Last noon, my friends and I go to a place near my college. We are trying to do our task. Instead of doing our task, we ended up browsing about dance practice and video calling with an Arabic people from one of my friend face book. I also looking for some job that I can take during my time after classes. Cause I want work to helping my mom or at least I can spend my money on dancing class and acting class. Y’all now right, what is my damn goal?. As I said, I really want be an artist or actress. I love acting and dancing, although I like dancing more. This will be the year when I starting to reach my own goal and focusing in finishing my study. No more years, this will be the last year I am in this university, I promise. I don’t want delay it anymore. I am old enough for being a girl in a girl group right? So, I guess I’ll take my dream as an actress that loves to dancing and singing. I don’t know what fortune will say about my future. But I think it’s worth to try. When I brave enough to dream, it mean I had to brave enough to life my dream. I dislike to being dictate in everything. My mind and soul need a surgery, to keep focus on my own dream. I don’t want someone hire me for their own dream, even they are my parents. When my dream comes true, I will make a house in Arab for my mom. That’s my mom’s biggest dream. She never asked me something to big. Since this is her only wish that she keep saying for ages. I will try my best to make it real. Am sorry mom, I ever blaming you when u always defending my younger sister and always make her wish come true. Whether you are never did that to me. I always think that u never love me, even once. That’s when I think why you make me life with grandma from a baby till I teenage. I never know what you have been through I never know how depressed you are till you want to end your life. Mom, with or without father I will always try my best to look after you and my younger sister. Although we always fight, I hope u know that I love u so much. Just please stay with me little longer. I will make u happy and proud of me. Don’t ever listen to someone else word. They always likes to saying shit about us just to entertaining them self, when they never realize that they also have a shitty life and their life is way more messed up than us. Mom, you are everything that I had right now. I may angry to your husband, but I won’t waste my time anymore with keep angry to him. I will way more focus in my dream, you and young sister.